


learning not to care

by angstyauthor (wedontwritelemons)



Category: Mean Girls - Richmond/Benjamin/Fey
Genre: Can be read as slash, F/F, Pre-Slash, i feel like people dont talk enough about how regina was screwed over during canon, i love them, so I will, soft, they communicate like healthy teens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-08
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:40:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25776031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wedontwritelemons/pseuds/angstyauthor
Summary: Janis always cared about what people thought.It never ended very well for her due to her popularity status at school as resident dyke.But maybe a certain blonde can come around and help teach her not to care so much.
Relationships: Regina George & Janis Sarkisian, Regina George/Janis Sarkisian
Comments: 15
Kudos: 37





	learning not to care

The spring fling is all too loud. 

Despite being my date, I lost Damian about a half-hour after Cady made her speech. He was my ride home, so I  _ knew _ he was somewhere in the crowd. Probably hanging out with his theater friends.

They were probably better company than me. Damian deserved time with people who weren't so down all the time.

Maybe he was talking to Cady.

She had apologized, and while Damian accepted it immediately, I wasn't quite ready.

Her words hurt.

More then I'd care to admit. They hurt a lot.

I put up a facade of never caring but deep down- I did. I'm a high school student, can you blame me? I know I can't get everyone's approval. In fact- I don't get  _ most _ people's approval, being space dyke and all.

I care. 

And Cady knew that.

I step towards the gymnasium doors, no longer in the mood to party.

School dances suck anyway.

I don't really know where I'm heading as I aimlessly walk down the halls. 

The only sounds are my heels clicking and the fading bass of the music. 

I stop at the girl's bathroom, hesitating as I glance at the door. If I want to be alone, a room full of drunk white girls touching up makeup is  _ not _ the place to be.

But no sounds are coming out.

I push the door open and- to my surprise- there's no one there.

I let the door swing shut behind me, stepping in front of the mirror. 

Maybe its the lighting, but I look exhausted. I  _ am _ exhausted, but the pound of concealer I applied wasn't doing anything to hide it. 

My hair that Damian had carefully straightened was starting to curl again at the bottom. It never stayed very long after being styled with heat. 

I tossed the strands over my shoulder and stepped back from the mirror. 

I've looked better.

I've also looked a lot worse.

The bathroom door opens as I turn to leave. I step backward slightly, prepared to briskly pass whoever is walking in and hope there are no dyke comments thrown my way.

What I wasn't prepared to do was become face to face with Regina George, crying. 

"Oh," She says flatly, tears spilling down her cheeks. "I didn't think somebody would be in here. I'm sorry."

"No, I was-" I freeze as she shuts the door behind her. "I was gonna leave."

"Wait," Regina walks over, stopping in front of me. "I want to say something to you really fast. Then you can leave, ignore everything that's happened tonight, go back to being a bitchy emo. Just-"

I bristle, ready to face a homophobic comment, maybe a slap, probably some unoriginal insult.

"I'm sorry."

All snappy comments die in my throat and my jaw goes slack. "What?"

"For- what I did in middle school. I'm sorry."

"Oh."

It feels a little late for an apology. Like, a highschool bathroom at nine at night, four years after the whole ordeal is a bit overdue.

I shift uncomfortably. Even in middle school, Regina never cried.

To see her do it so openly now-

Well. I guess the girl's bathroom isn't very open. 

"I'm sorry too." I offer. "For what I did this year. I was angry and it was wrong."

It was offputting, to see Regina in her neck brace. In a chain of cause and effect, it was my fault. 

"Your anger was justified," Regina says, turning to the mirror and swiping at her lower lip, fixing her lipstick before grabbing a paper towel to address the mascara streaks on her cheeks.

"Doesn't make my  _ actions _ justified, though."

"I guess."

We sit in a tense quiet for a bit. My phone isn't on me and Damian may be wondering where I am but- I can't just leave a crying girl in a neck brace alone in a school bathroom. 

"Are you-" I reach out to place a hand on her shoulder but hesitate. "Okay?"

Regina bits her lip, glancing pitifully at herself in the mirror. "Cady's actions hurt me. I know it was your idea, but it was Cady who followed through. I lost everybody. I mean- I only had  _ two _ friends but," She shakes her head. "I guess it put into perspective how you felt in eight grade. If that was the goal of your whole deal then- I'm sorry."

"I-"

Guilt hit me hard as I looked away from Regina. I never thought about how taking down Regina would make her feel. I was so worried about how it would make  _ me _ feel. And what good came out of it?

I just got hurt again.

Different person, same cause. 

"Cady hurt me too, yknow. She wasn't all one side."

Regina looked at me questioningly.

"The night she threw a party- it was the night of my art show. She lied. She said she'd be  _ out of town _ . And when I found out-" I looked at Regina through the reflection of the mirror. "I got upset. I confronted her. She accused me of being in love with her."

Regina let out a breathy  _ oh _ . 

"Don't feel too bad for me." I say with a scoff, looking away. I cross my arm, suddenly feeling defensive. I hate when people care about me. Empathy made me feel all weird and squirmy. 

"It wasn't my first rodeo," I sat flatly. "I've had practice."

"Janis-" There's a hand on my shoulder, I shrug it off.

"Besides! I had Damian. I wasn't alone. You didn't have anyone. So- sorry about that."

Regina shook her head. "It wasn't your fault. I guess Cady let being queen bee to her head a bit. She screwed us both over, huh."

"A little." I turn back around to fully face Regina. I was pretty tall for my age even without the heels I was wearing. They weren't tall, I preferred my flat combat boots. Regina on the other hand perfected the art of walking in heels. She was wearing platforms that made her almost equal to my hight.

Almost.

Regina smiled a bit. We were standing too close to count at homo, it was a little unnerving.

"I was actually hoping to catch you tonight."

"Oh?" 

I leaned back a bit, my face flushing.  _ This all sounded very suggestive and I dunno if- _

"I was wondering- you don't have to answer now but- would you want to try again with this whole, being friends thing?"

"I-" I step backward, creating a good amount of space between us. "I did my time as plastic. Sorry."

"I got hit by a bus, Janis. I'm not the same person anymore." Regina scoffs, seeming offended. "I have bigger priorities now that highschool status. I don't want to be friends with plastic Janis. She was cookie-cutter, pink, and boring. Just like I don't want to be plastic Regina anymore."

I stare at her blankly.

"I want to be friends with the real Janis Sarkisian. The artist. Maybe get to know Damian since you two are always together. I dunno just- get  _ real _ friends. I love Karen and Gretchen to death but" She sighs. "I want people to be friends  _ with _ me. Not friends  _ for _ me."

I smile softly. "Then I'd love to get to know the real Regina."

"Wouldn't we both."

Regina turns to the mirror, fixing her hair. "You were like me once. You understand. I lack  _ personality _ . It's boring. But maybe it's not too late to find one? I want to try lacrosse. Maybe. I dunno. Some sport. But- I want you to be there with me, as I figure myself out. I missed you." She holds out her hand, its a plea for peace, shes extending the olive branch. 

The Regina standing in front of me felt so familiar. Like in eight grade, when Gretchen and Karen weren't around, the hard plastic shell would melt and a Regina full of emotions and love would shine through. 

It was the side of Regina I liked. 

The side of Regina I missed.

I grin taking her hand. "I missed you too."

She squeezes my hand, pulling me towards the bathroom door. I allow myself to smile, a grin on my face and a lightness in my heart. 

"You wanna dance?" Regina asks as we walk down the halls, the music growing louder. 

I smile. "Let's dance."

Our fingers are still intertwined when we enter the gymnasium. It's dark, and nobody can tell, but it's something middle school Janis and Regina wouldn't think of doing. 

Its a pop song I don't recognize, but Regina drags me to the center of the gym regardless. We giggle like children on a playground and people stare but for the first time in a long time- I don't care.


End file.
